Psychotomy

the last couple days i never got around to posting. thursday i got home and i was depressed, bored, tired. bad combo :/ was gonna blog. but decided that took too much effort. in the end, i ended up playing eq2 for a couple hours (got some real progress too, wow!)

yesterday i was still bored and a little down, and i was thinking. and those three things just do NOT combine well. that’s how i ended up shaving my legs in college. i was bored. the cuts and burns on my arm, bored and depressed.

so, yesterday, i was bored, depressed, and thikning. i’ve got (oh god!) a plan! then i looked up information b/c i was curious and neglected to post. so …

death! yeah, this is why depressed is bad.
by a thousand cuts! … bored bad too
over the course of three years! now? now i’m thinking, see …

so, the brilliant theory was a cut a day on my arm (just enough to bleed (if it doesn’t bleed it’s a scratch, not a cut … yeah, thinkng again)) or something, over the course of three years. thousand cuts == dead. but ,since it’s over 3 years, my body isn’t being subjected to all that at once, see, so i’m perfectly fine (healthy anyway), but i died! sweet eh?

yeah, so, i’m not ACTUALLY going to do it. if i felt i was even vaguely likely to, i’d hand over my pocket knife again (i’ve done it half a dozen times before, not like it’s new to me :o). but, see, thinking depressed bored bad.

OTOH, i learned that “death by a thousand cuts” involved like 30 cuts or something (fingers, toes (or hands and feet), arms, legs, head ; sensationalized to add cutting off of ears, noes, eyes, tongue, joints instead of whole fingers/hands .. romanticized (wow, such a BAD word there eh?) to “thousand cuts” b/c it sounded cooler than “slow slicing” …) … actually, drawn, hanged, (disemboweled, ) quatered looks like it might have been worse :o and apparently the whole “tied to four horses run in different directions” thing? utter crap :o

Posted in: general by attriel /